... (not quite) fully si(c)k

i hate being sick. i like to eat, but i really hate being sick.

i'm so utterly uninterested in being sick, it's probably impossible to plumb the depths of my dissatisfaction with the state of being sick. if a book was written to explain how little interest i have in being sick, it would be the literal neverending story.

my despite of being sick is probably bad enough, but when i theorise about the specifics of my sickness, diagnosing the symptoms, speculating on the internals of how my sickness is presenting... and then hear my doctor say the same things... well, i get a little bit despondant.

i thought, "well, there's no petichiae(?) that i can see, so it's probably not bubonic plague..."

boil going bad? pilenital sinus? ingrowing hair? infected sweat gland? something serious to do with a lymph node? (that last one would actually give me the heebie-jeebies a little bit...)

whatever it is, i have some kind of lump growing under my armpit. came up in only a day or so. i didn't do anything about it right away because sometimes these things just appear and vanish in equally speedy measure. two mornings after it first presented, however, i thought i'd better see the quack, if for no other reason than i'd like to be able to use my arm painlessly again. i feel like my underarm hair has become entangled and is being unknotted with every movement of my arm.

i'm on some drugs now, and hopefully they'll get the swelling down, and whatever is causing this will right itself.